Relationships

Drop some truth to create a breakthrough

“You wanna know why you’re hurting so much when we workout, Andrea? Because you’re doing the bare minimum,” my personal trainer said to me. I was hurtin’ bad after a few too many jumping jacks (300 to be exact) and I wanted to hobble across the gym and choke him with whatever strength I had left.

I was ticked off. But, I knew in my heart, that he was right. I’ve been dragging my feet – quite literally – when it comes to eating well, sleeping and exercising. And, oh I have so many excuses but they all lead to one truth: I’m not doing the work. Plain and simple. I needed him to help me see that.

Sometimes, people need to hear some truth in order to breakthrough something really big that’s holding them back. But, telling people we love some cold-hard truth can be really challenging. Here’s how to do it:

Paying the perfect compliment

If you think of every conversation as an opportunity to say something nice, you’ll find that your relationships will really improve. The most dynamic people I know (those people who everyone seems to love) are the ones who are constantly praising others. They notice and truly appreciate the little and big things about others and they let them know it in a clear, respectful way.

Here’s how to do it...

Three ways to gain perspective in a conversation (and get more control)

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and in the middle of it all, you hear a voice in your head that says: “I’m totally judging you.”

Ha! I have. I admit it…and I’m not afraid to say it because I know I’m not alone. We all judge. Let me say that again: we all judge. It’s part of our biology…we are literally “hard-wired” to quickly determine in any situation if someone or something intends to do us harm. Judgement isn’t always a bad thing; it often protects us.

Where it trips us up is when we start judging in moments of non-crisis

The 3 most important words you can say to someone

So often, we feel the need to fill conversations with our pearls of wisdom or "caring advice". And, while it most often comes from a place of genuine caring, it's important that we take the time to realize that sometimes three simple words mean more than anything else we could ever say...

Represent Yourself Well

“My friends and I have a name for ‘those’ people.” The man with whom I was chatting had just said those words, and as I heard them, I could feel my heart drop. I had just met him and I was really hoping to jive with this dude. He was referring to a specific group of people in the theatre community.

“We call them art-fa@s.”

Boom. My heart fluttered – and not in the good way. He quickly went on to justify his statement through disclaimers of how his friends in the theatre world had come up with the term, so… “it was okay.”

It was not okay...